Here are some jokes to get you ready for the Big Game:








One day, while driving along, I saw a priest. I thought I would do a
good deed, so I pulled over and asked the priest, "Where are you going Father?"

"I'm going to give mass at St. Francis Church, about 2 miles down the
road," replied the priest. "Climb in, Father! I'll give you a lift!"

The priest climbed into the rear passenger seat, and we continued down
the road. Suddenly , I saw a Michigan fan walking down the road, with
that "M" shirt on and I instinctively swerved as if to hit him. But, as
usual, I swerved back into the road just in time. Even though I was
certain that I had missed the guy, I still heard a loud "THUD."

Not understanding where the noise came from, I glanced in my mirrors
but still didn't see anything. I then remembered the priest, and turned
to the priest and said, "Sorry Father, I almost hit that Michigan fan."

"That's OK," replied the priest, "I got him with the door."
**********************************************************
Michigan football practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a
player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the
practice field. The head coach immediately suspended practice and called
the police and federal investigators. After a complete analysis, FBI
forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to players
was the GOAL LINE.

Practice resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to
encounter the substance again.
*************************************************
A Michigan football player was almost killed in a horseback riding incident. He fell out of the saddle, caught one foot in a stirrup.... and came close to being trampled to death. Just in the nick of time, the Meijer Store Greeter rushed over and unplugged the horse.