Q: What three things are common between the sun and woman's underwear?

A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both Disappear at night.



Q: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?



A: Because they are tired of using their own.



Q: What's common between men and video?



A: Both go backward...forward...backward...forward...backward....forward...

stop and eject.





Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?

A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it doesn't come means you are in big trouble.







Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?



A: A teabag.







7 qualities to be a perfect wife:



Beautiful,

Responsible

Energetic

Adorable

Sweet

Truthful and

Self-Organized.

In short, she must have good B.R.E.A.S.T.S







Q: What is the similarity between men and rats?

A: Both keep searching for new HOLES.







Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?

A: When the baby looks like his dad, then it is biology. When the baby looks like the neighbour, then it is sociology.







Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having 3 meals a day as I have advised?

Lady: Doctor, I thought you had said 3 males a day.







Q: Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, a mosquito enters the girl's skirt. Guess where it would have bitten?



Answer:



The boy's hand.





Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take a bath. Tarzan removed his clothes. All the animals laughed. Tarzan asked "Why"?

The animals told him..........."Your tail is back tofront".

Husband asks , "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??
"Without Information , Fighting Everytime"
Wife replies," No, It means,"With Idiot For Ever !!!"


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Three Feelings:

What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?


Stress is when wife is pregnant,

Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant and

Panic is when both are pregnant.

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A journalist asked a man who was traveling with six children, are all these kids yours??

Man replies; No, I work in a condom factory & these are customer complaints.
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Two men met while both where looking for their lost wives.
1st: What does yours look like?

2nd: She is 5"7, 36-24-36, Fair, Black eyes. What about yours?

1st: Forget mine. Let's find yours!!

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A Son asks the difference between confidence and confidential.
Dad says, you are my son, I'm confident. Your friend is also my son, that's confidential!