Cam MTB - the Cambridge Mountain Bikers' Forum

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DISCLAIMER. MOUNTAIN BIKING CAN BE DANGEROUS. YOU JOIN US AT YOUR OWN RISK.

SAFETY BRIEFING.

  • Wear a helmet. Despite recent advances in medical science, brains still cannot be mended nor replaced.
  • Wear gloves or mitts. Hands often hit the ground first. Cuts and grazes invite infection and a hospital visit.
  • Wear eye protection, it only takes a twig or thorn to lose an eye. Crud catchers are a good idea in mucky weather.
  • When downhilling, for your own protection, allow plenty of space behind the rider in front.
  • Bring a bare minimum emergency tool kit and a spare inner tube.
  • Breakdowns are a bore. Plan not to have any by ensuring your bike is in perfect working order.
  • Punctures are also tedious. You can minimise them by fitting latex tubes, slime tubes or running tubeless tyres.
  • Don't ride too close to the person in front. If they crash into a badger, you'll need time to swerve.

Photo: CAMMTB Winter 2024 rides have been posted up - please click on the Runs List link.

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CamMTB poetry throw down

It seems Cliff has triggered some sort of poetry vibe in the group (or is it just me??). Whilst enjoying the ride to Over last night i developed at little poem, which some of you had the pleasure of hearing live, feel free to suggest new lines...

There was a man from dover
Who went to play cricket in over
He was due to bowl the last over
but he was out on the boundary so had to hurry over
during the rush he over did it
his heart rate was over the limit
He fainted when got to the wicket
and his game of cricket was over

Adriano - 2017

@Pastry - happy for you to share this one in your village news letter, I can perform recitals at village events if required, payment in scones.

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

You'll oft hear the roar of thunder
With onlookers staring in wonder
Another CamMTB off road blunder
At sea level, or sometimes under

To Over

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

A cyclist who was a ve-gan
Wrote rhymes that would never quite scan
When asked why
There came the reply
"because I always try to fit as many words in the last line as I possibly can"

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

You are Ed Sheeran and I claim my ten pounds.

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

Wow! Rick, I have no idea what you are on about but that is a very moving poem.

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

Just listen to an Ed Sheeran gabble-sorry-song and all will be clear-or not
Thanks for the plaudit anyway, it's good to know my work provokes thought.

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

He don't wanna get there, but he needs time
He ain't sophisticated, nor well-educated
After all the hours he wasted, still he needs time.
He needs time - he needs time for livin',
He needs time - for someone just to see him.
He ain't had no lovin'
For no reason or rhyme
And the whole world's above him.
Well it's not as though he's fat-
No there's more to this than that-
See he tries to play it cool-
Wouldn't be nobodys fool.
FEENNNNNNdurio Feennnnnndurio yeah yeah!

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

Duncan
He don't wanna get there, but he needs time
He ain't sophisticated, nor well-educated
After all the hours he wasted, still he needs time.
He needs time - he needs time for livin',
He needs time - for someone just to see him.
He ain't had no lovin'
For no reason or rhyme
And the whole world's above him.
Well it's not as though he's fat-
No there's more to this than that-
See he tries to play it cool-
Wouldn't be nobodys fool.
FEENNNNNNdurio Feennnnnndurio yeah yeah!


I think Duncan has captured the very essence of Fenduro remarkably succinctly and, surprisingly for Duncan, lucidly.

You have an anthem Adriano.

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

The grey fenland skies of late have got my creative juices flowing again so I thought I would revive this thread with a bit of freestyle acid poetry.

There once was a man from Over
who yearned to own a Rover
One was for sale over in Papworth St Agnes
But it was slightly over his budget
His bank account was already overdrawn
So he poured over his belongings for things to pawn
He found a sliver spoon, and was truly over the moon
But in hindsight he was just over excited
As the spoon was worth little over a fiver
Alas he could still not afford a rover
so robbed a bank

Re: CamMTB poetry throw down

Bravo! Truly a star is born - move over Carol-Anne Duffy!