Cam MTB - the Cambridge Mountain Bikers' Forum

Click on the "return to website" button to see our new website with loads more details of who we are, where and when we ride and much more.

DISCLAIMER. MOUNTAIN BIKING CAN BE DANGEROUS. YOU JOIN US AT YOUR OWN RISK.

SAFETY BRIEFING.

  • Wear a helmet. Despite recent advances in medical science, brains still cannot be mended nor replaced.
  • Wear gloves or mitts. Hands often hit the ground first. Cuts and grazes invite infection and a hospital visit.
  • Wear eye protection, it only takes a twig or thorn to lose an eye. Crud catchers are a good idea in mucky weather.
  • When downhilling, for your own protection, allow plenty of space behind the rider in front.
  • Bring a bare minimum emergency tool kit and a spare inner tube.
  • Breakdowns are a bore. Plan not to have any by ensuring your bike is in perfect working order.
  • Punctures are also tedious. You can minimise them by fitting latex tubes, slime tubes or running tubeless tyres.

Photo: CAMMTB rides have restarted.

CAMMTB Forum
Start a New Topic 
Author
Comment
The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Hello!

To help people decide on whether they want to sign up to this year's Fenduro or not, I have started assembling a Fencyclopedia of Fenduro related terms. Anyone got anything else to add?

FC

http://www.fenduro.com/p/fencyclopedia.html

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fenscrutiating - the pain suffered when turning the handlebars after a 20 mile straight.

Fentropolis - a collection of dwellings above the surface of the fens.

Fendewater - where the unwary rider ends up if they try and take a turn in the wrong place.

Fenshui - the Fenland art on Minamlist Living.

Fengui - a man living in the Fens

Pete Marsh - an ironage man found burried in the Marshes - i kid you not, google it.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Good work Pat!

I had also thought of Fen Shui! but my interpretation was of reorganising pub furniture to accommodate group drinking following a mindnumbing ride on the Fens. I shall update the Fencyclopedia

 photo Fencyclopedia_zpsjgelxiuf.jpg

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fenereal Disease - make your own mind up
Fenland Blow - make your own mind up
Fenstrual Cycle - make your own mind up
Fentanyl - what I'm on

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fendamental - someone who enjoys riding to Ely and back. Without stopping for a few

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fentonesque*- To ride the bike that was the cheapest ...ever, no really is that possible for enough years to the point where an FENHS procedure is needed to repair the carry on doing the same.

* also a rather strange you tube flid** involving a dog, a London park & Hitler
** is this still PCOK?***
PC Okay, the Japanese ex warrior who was always a try Samurai true gent and decent chap back when I woz a boy

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Solid contributions - some perhaps a bit too ofFensive for the Fencyclopedia...El Mariachi

Gastrofenteritis - an illness usually experienced after eating at selected Fenland institutions

Fenezuelan - an incomprehensible Fenland dialect spoken only by Duncan Cook

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fenital Warts- An STD linked to the Fen PapaLazurus virus. Most commonly transmitted by unprotected sex with a cabbage or road kill.

Fenphones- Very popular choice of communicating machine design and manufacturer, part of the huge privately owned Cabbage group based in the Sunnier Spring Onion dip area of Fen state. Also see Fenpods, Cabbage Whopper computers etc

Fendark- Popular Sunday evening period drama watched mostly by female Fensapiens (Femsapiens) over a large glass of Manea blanc.

Fenstanton- The word meaning a camp of Fenland people ( mostly Fenezuelan speaking Feneg nomads) who travelled many many days and nights to set up camp by the A14 or other dual carriageways. Not to be confused with Fenkies or Fenkers.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

 photo Fenital_zpsk9yexkzt.jpg

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fenstrual Cycle - monthly foray out into the flatlands. Often undertaken when the decorators are in.

Pre-fenstrual tension - that feeling of 'oh God! Why am I doing this?' that occurs shortly before a Fenstrual cycle, when contemplating the incessant headwind and bleak landscape.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Good work Tony.

I think I will have to gauge some opinion around the use of the word fenstrual from a focus group...as Fenduro considers selling out in the future I don't want to alienate any groups.

Besides, I think there is some overlap between pre-fenstrual tension and exisfential crisis: a moment, often induced by the bleak fenland landscape, at which an individual questions the very foundations of their life: whether this life has any meaning, purpose, or value.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fenidorm- A sandy peat area that has flooded and is over 20 degrees c on a summers day.
Quote " Eee by eck you there Guy Martin, it's right Fenidorm"

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fen Dover- A famous pornographic film maker from East Heckington

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Fenny Lane- A street in Coninsby that had a barbers shop which was made famous by the 1960's super group The Featles.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Jazz Fenk- A popular style of music with many early eighties Fenland computer programmers and a future Mechanical services engineer. Groups included Level 0, Quite a bright world, Kebabatak, excommunicatedincognito, James Taylor Fenqueieieit, Light of the turd and who could forget Fen inc.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

FEN- THE annual motor cycle meet organised by the Carrington Farmers Harley David and his son Brian To raise money for all the poor "Missing the sixth finger" folk of THE FEN,,....,,,S. It is well documented to have helped bring awareness to the "issues of the fen" to the samaritans & especially "Befriend a fen" projects of 1991.
Billy Joel attended this efent causing the "Many of Manea" to have an erection leading to bringing awareness to "Red Cell aid" a subsiduary of Duracell/Papworth inc. One reciprient was famous for commenting "Plug the fucker in, I'm going HYPO"

Later the Meet moved to Rings End near Guy him which then alienated many homofenians and their sets.

Copyright of 2 foot six below the road but yes the land looks very fertile, all damages will be paid for.con

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Wow! Very fentertaining duncano! Will add Jazz Fenk to the website in the morning but in that last entry I think your Fenezuelan was too strong, I just can't comprefend it.

I was in an infentive mood this morning and came up with "Fenema, a common procedure to cleanse the body after a bout of gastrofentiritis"

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Sweet Fenny Adams

The amount of sense Duncan's last post made.

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

Defending - A Jamaican pagga out Manea way

Forefending - a mass pagga with participants from Mepal, Over, Wisbech and Tydd St Giles

Offending - a bank holiday pagga at Hunstanton

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

It is not ofFen that I criticize creativity, but none of those are making it into the fencyclopeadia as they just are fenny.(No ofFence) What is pagga?

Re: The Fencyclopedia, call for contributions

You've never been in a pagga?